I Love My Country (And My Sister Kimberly)

I thought I'd start with that because, well, there are so many ultra-conservative assholes who think that anyone with any-any-any liberal opinions is anti-American. And they are known for reading my blog. Right?

So, yes, this will be a vaguely heavily politics saturated post.

Let's discuss what happened in Massachusetts. That state (you're a state, you bastards. Uppity commonwealth b.s.) just elected a Republican to replace the well-known, well-loved, well-Dem'd Ted Kennedy. (How did Ted become the nickname for Edward? It's further off than Dick is to Richard.) (Although I've known some Richards who were definitely Dicks.)

And that's fine by me. Massachusetts had a message to send. And in our fair democratic (as in democracy) nation, that's exactly what the vote is for. Those politi-bastards in the Capitol need to have their collective ass handed to them every once in a while. Or often. Let's go with often.

And if our government ran like it was supposed to (hey, did you notice the size of that "if"?), i.e. citizens elected a representative (lower case "r") that represented their views and then said representative went to our land's beloved capital and- and here's the kicker- represented those people that voted for him/her, and voted in the best interest of those people- oh, and maybe, say, the rest of the country- well, hell, that would have been a damn fine message for them to send!

Except for the completely effed up "us versus them" mentality of the aforementioned politi-bastards. I'm sure you remember, those in this country who share my United States citizenship (and those who don't) (and those in other countries who learn more about our country than we ever do), from back in your basic school lessons in Government and U.S. History, that we as a nation did not start out with this two-party, my-penis-is-bigger-than-your-penis, elephant-donkey crapola. George Washington not only was not a member of a political party, he was actually opposed to them. Can't imagine why.

Yet here we stand (okay, we're Americans, so here we sit), 13 score and several years later, and we can't get shit for shit done because they're so busy counting sides and no one will step a toe off their party's line because god forbid they think for themselves. Except when it comes to voting themselves a raise. That reminds me. I need to get my coworkers together- see if they'd all like to vote us some cost-of-living wage increases.

So I think we need to help them get out of their own way. Which, I think, is what Massachusetts voters had in mind. But it needs to be broader than a single politician change-over. My very first thought? How about this funny little thing that we have that applies to the presidential office, but, miraculously, not to the Senate or House. That thing is called a "term limit". Why is this a good thing you ask?

Well. You, my lovely readers, are frickin' geniuses. No doubt. However! If you're in public right now, look around. If you're in the office right now, look around. Next time you're in traffic, look around. In the grocery store, in the bank, everywhere you go, every time you watch television, every website you visit- other than this one (and your own, of course). All those people. Those people? Are fucking morons. They cannot be trusted. But the vast majority of them, their votes count just as strongly as yours. And if they see a name they recognize and see a name they don't, they're going with the one they recognize- even if by "recognize", they "vaguely remember that name from a newspaper or something". Like that article about the corrupt politician (redundant, sorry) accepting bribes from the local mob boss. But the fact is, nine times out of ten, the incumbent gets reelected. (No, I'm not citing this stat. You don't just trust me by now?) And, no, this is not all just because of morons. There are other factors. But most of those factors are not "I am so much better than my pathetic opponent". Wouldn't it be great if some of these politi-bastards spent a little less time campaigning and a little more time doing the whole improve-our-country job thingy?

But that would involve putting their country first and themselves second by voting term limits on their own j-o-b-s.

And speaking of campaigning, wouldn't it be fan-frickin'-tastic if we outlawed campaign ads on television? Oh, mygod. My October would be brilliant.