Monday, April 26, 2010

Dear Industry of Growers of Chickens,

I know that we, as a society, want everything bigger and faster and more, more more, more! (Everyone's inner-reading-voice should have just converted to Boris Karloff- "And they'd sing! AND they'd SING! SING! SING! SING"!) (That was a reference to How the Grinch Stole Christmas! If you didn't get that from the last set of parentheses, you should never tell me because I will make fun of you forEVER.) I get it. The chickens have been bred for their breast-size, much like Hollywood actresses. You've gotten to the point that the poor little chickys can't stand up on their own, much less even flap their wings. All because we Americans like maintaining our fat asses, and it's way cheaper to grow one huge chicken than two little ones.

So, yes, I get why chickens, and more specifically chicken breast, has gotten bigger and bigger over the years. But this?

Holy Crap Look at the Size of That Breast

That's frickdiculous. Absofrickinlutely frickdiculous. Yeah, I had to double up on the made-up words to express the point. Thanks for that, too, Industry of Growers of Chickens.

Loveys and salmonella,



Call Me Cate said...

Wow, what big breasts you have! That's like the Dolly Parton of chicken right there. And just in time for Boobquake yesterday!

McGriddle Pants said...

Makes me want to go out and buy some chicks and raise my own chicken boobies and my own eggs.
It'd still probably take 183 generations of my OWN chicken breeding to get rid of all the crazy ass chicken hormones and crap we've been putting into them recently.

InMyOwnZoo said...

I read recently that meat chickens only take 8-18 weeks til grown enough for slaughter size.
Oh and I can see a 1 pound breast- I mean -some of the egg laying chicken breeds I have been looking into are like 8 pounds!

AinsleyB said...

the poor little guys (not kidding here) can't even now you know why I'm gonna raise my own.