Sunday, February 8, 2009

UPDATED: So apparently we've made it from one Six Word Saturday to the next with nary a non-phone-in post in between.

And I make no promises for this one either.

We spent a lovely day at the zoo today... I'm sure something funny happened... Oh! Sam donated a portion of his buffalo chicken wrap to the bin, at which point a black squirrel (as the zoo has both grey and black (okay, really dark brown), I feel the need to specify) (and by "has", I mean the little bastards own all the eating areas) climbed into the garbage can and reemerged with- not the bread of the wrap, as one would expect a cute little tree rat to choose- but a chunk of buffalo-sauce-dipped chicken.

What the mother hell? When did squirrels start eating meat??? He was apparently not a fan of the sauce itself because he systematically tore off the exterior surface of said chicken chunk, the scraps of which he then carefully dropped on our heads. Because he was in a tree. Because he was a squirrel. Eating chicken.

Now the grey squirrels. They ate the saucy bits that the black squirrel discarded. I'm not sure who is tougher in this situation, the black squirrel with his mad "I takes what I wants and I drops these icky bits on your heads" skills, or the grey squirrels who would like a shot of jack to go with these chicken wings, please.

I don't know if it's the time of year or the sun was just right, but you could see right through the fur of the black squirrel's tail, right down to the nasty pink skin. It's a good thing they have that fur because their tails look JUST. Like. Rat Tails. JUSTLIKE.


As a bonus, I present a Sarah&Sam conversation, driving on the way to the zoo:

Sam: Whoa! We just played chicken with a whole flock of birds! We won, though.
Sarah: I'm pretty sure we didn't. I didn't hear any thump thumps.

UPDATE: I just looked the smarmy little rodents up on Wikipedia. "However some squirrels also consume meat, especially when faced with hunger. Squirrels have been known to eat insects, eggs, small birds, snakes and rodents." The day I see a squirrel eating a snake? I know it's the apocalypse.

4 comments:

Call Me Cate said...

I'd say this is decidedly NOT phoned in.

Those are some really bad-ass squirrels you're dealing with. I once met the President of our college (a priest, no less) on campus back in the day. He was feeding the squirrels LifeSavers. "They really prefer the green ones." Umm, ok. Apparently they really prefer the meat ones. Who knew?

See any pandas at your zoo? I have a panda post scheduled for tomorrow that I'm pretty sure I'm going to hell for.

Unknown said...

I'm so confused. But giggly just the same over the carnivorous black squirrel. Narsty.

And Cate, I'll meet you in hell dude. Hey, didn't we have this convo before about saving me a seat? Shit I am totally blonde today.

kim said...

this post made me laugh--we've got black squirrels here in my town, they're quite the desirable neighborhood attraction. there's actually been people who have trapped them in a cage and kidnapped them to bring them to their part of town...I think if anyone witnessed them eating meat, they'd consider them gods and make them rulers of our little town!

Laura said...

Just like a rat tail-TOO FUNNY! Laura